The Seven Deadly Holidays


New Year’s Envy:
Valustine’s Day:
Indepridence Day:
Both kinds of romantics—bitter and naïve—yearn for one-night magic to change everything into Gatsby’s parties, but green lights turn into red lights and DUIs in the sleet, and city doorways reek of recycled champagne.
Not about sex, but dark chocolate, red lingerie, a dozen roses purchased at triple price, reserved tables of nouveau cuisine, and velvet boxes of diamond bracelets feeding the fever of what will you spend for me?
Bombs in color—how fun! Who cares who we are as long as we’re number one?
An apocalypse of anonymity, alter egos let loose at dusk demand candy in costumes, rehearsing entitlement for their starring moments decades later when they don masks to rob banks and shoot presidents.
Oh, god, the family again, ameliorated only by turkey grease and pie crust lard washed down with mudslides into a deep tryptophan coma and the hypnotic violence of television football.
75% off plus free shipping!

Sara Backer

Sara Backer, author of the novel American Fuji (Penguin/Berkley 2009), is guilty of Envy and Wrath, but is serving a life sentence in Sloth for multiple charges of Procrastination. Despite this, her writing has been awarded Djerassi and Norton Island artist residencies and appeared in over 100 journals, most recently in theNewerYork, Turtle Island Quarterly, PANK, and Asimov’s Science Fiction magazine. For links to her writing published online, please visit

Sara Backer's website »